I must say, I’m usually alright with sitting in the uncomfortable and embracing the aha moments, but I’m having a hard time with these exercises.
Geez, the tears are streaming and I’ve only written two lines.
The focus this month was Mindfulness Yoga. We were tasked to commit to doing it three times a week.
Broken to Brilliant had generously organised a couple of activities for us to try different types of yoga practices in a safe and nurturing environment.
The first yoga activity was a meditation practice based on the ancient tradition of Yoga Nidra called iRest.
The second was an incredible afternoon of Yin Yoga and sound bath healing (drumming). Yin Yoga provides the space for you to breathe and connect with your whole body.
I thoroughly loved it and got so much from the experiences.
Stretching without bending like a pretzel
What had I loved about it?
I was able to do the stretches without having bend myself like a pretzel and fall flat on my face.
I was all-in and excited to complete the task of three sessions per week, either before work or in the evening. I had set my yoga mat up ready for me so there was no backing out.
The first week was great!
I felt more relaxed and could fall asleep without replaying my meditation music. Muscles I hadn’t felt in a long time woke up and declared they enjoyed the stretches.
We were happy!
Old patterns seeping in….
So, what happened?
In the middle of this month’s focus, I was triggered by a colleague. Although my rational brain was telling me – or should I say LOUDLY ENCOURAGING me – to return to the practice of mindfulness yoga, my old patterns of hibernation took hold for a moment or two.
It’s okay to set your own pace
I took on this meditation task at someone else’s pace rather than my own pace. I now connect with the understanding that’s not necessarily the best thing for me, and that’s okay.
I usually start out with the best intentions, and when I don’t keep to it I begin to feel I’m letting myself down. Then I internalise that I am going to let others down.
Yoga isn’t the first thing I would do for myself. However, I admit mindfulness is something I attempt to practise every day.
What I have come to know…
What I have come to know for sure in what has been a very enlightening month for me, is that I am totally okay with incorporating new activities into my life.
It’s also reassuring to know that I am expanding my toolkit and I can pick something out at any given time to bring joy into my world.
I undoubtedly will be exploring both types of yoga soon – at my own pace.
This Blog is a part of the Broken to Brilliant Blogging GEMS program, read other blogs from survivors about mindfulness yoga:
Read more about the Blogging GEMS Program
Thank you to:
Andrea Bolding for supporting survivors with iRest Yoga
Teresa, In Soul Yoga for supporting survivors with Yin Yoga
Harshi from Hum Healing for supporting survivors with with medicine drumming